Lift your energy by telling the truth

Tell the Truth
A lot of energy gets lost when you hold things in.

That goes for suppressed emotions and feelings, unspoken communications, unmet needs and desires, and what we in the self-help movement used to call “withholds”. A quick definition: A withhold is a communication that you’re not delivering. Something you’d like to say but aren’t. And it winds up costing you energy.

So if you want a really quick energy booster – a cup of espresso for the soul – try this: Tell the truth.

“If there’s someone you don’t want to talk to, if there’s something you don’t want to talk to, if there’s something you don’t want to do, or if there’s something you’re just plain uncomfortable about, nine out of ten times there’s some truth that hasn’t been spoken, and that kills your energy”, says life coach Lauren Zander. Most people just don’t ever really lay their cards out fully on the table, Zander says, and this has everything to do with the amount of energy a person can feel, experience, and enjoy in a relationship and in life.

“Consider”, she asks, “how you feel when you’re around someone and suppressing yourself. Or when you want something and you’re not getting it. How do you feel?” Her point is well taken. One thing you don’t feel in those circumstances is full of energy. The equation is a simple one: Relationships dictate our moods, and our moods dictate our energy. “That’s the formula here”, Zander explains.

THE TRUTH WILL SET YOUR ENERGY FREE
In another section, I talked about how having a “powerful conversation” could be an incredible energizer. But the converse is true as well – one bad (incomplete, unsatisfying) conversation and your mood can shift, and not in a positive way. Stuff is left unspoken and unresolved. Your energy is diminished. Your vitality is drained. “The only thing that will actually get that vitality back and enhance your energy is the liberating act of going back and telling the truth”, Zander says.

She’s right. If you accept this premise – that we leave our energy on the table when we get hurt, or when we don’t get what we want, or when we don’t speak up for ourselves.