Nervous disorders are simply the presentiment of our attitude to life. These are simply the symptomatic causes that emanate from our (wrong) actions. When mind is at unrest, the body also cannot escape onslaught of such/mental/disturbances. I have dwelt upon all these aspects in my book entitled 'Stress And Headache Management' in fairly good details. Mental disorders are not foisted upon us, rather our uncontrolled desires lead us to a state of Nervous breakdown and the resultant outcome is too horrifying to imagine even.
We often hear the terms 'Nerve wreak' 'Nervous', Nervous Breakdown', 'Neurotic', 'To be on one's Nerves' ends' etc. All these terms point to various aspects but one message they convey is that the person concerned has wilted under stress and strain due to which he suffered some sort of nervous disorder. Cases of Nervous origin are mounting up day-by-day and there is no respite and climb-down in sight.
FACTORS RESPONSIBLE FOR NERVOUS DISORDERS
From the foregoing description, we can easily make out what accounts for and what factors lead to nervous disorders which may be spelled as follows :
• Unbridled and in satiated desires.
• Avarice to hoard more and more.
• Being dissatisfied with one's life and achievements.
• Jealousy arising out of fortunes and riches of other persons, particularly the people around us (It includes colleagues, members of family, relatives, friends etc).
• Disturbed Married life or remaining a bachelor/Virgin for a long period.
• Sexual incompatibility
• Nagging marriage partner, or else a domineering, insulting and richer partner
• Incompatible financial status, or else low income, not sufficient to make even both ends meet.
• Problems posed by friends, colleagues, children, spouse.
• To care more for what is happening in the neighborhood than what is happening within the four walls of your home.
• Failure to make the 'house' a 'home'. Social withdrawal and inferiority complex.
• To be ill-at-ease in the office and at homes — a sign of maladjustment.
• Sudden financial crisis, loss/death of the loved one.
• Divorce or protracted separation, when there is no meeting of minds (and bodies also).
• Protracted illness, permanent infirmity — either of self or any family member.
• Delayed education and resultant delay in children's marriage.
• Extramarital Relationships or else. Job-related problems suspicious infidelity of the spouse.
I have simply given a few of the factors that are said to contribute to nervous disorders, and the list of causatives doesn't end here. There is hardly any person who hasn't undergone some of the aforementioned disturbances in one's life, nor is it true that problems take toll of mental and physical health in case of all the persons — some persons are 'happy-Go-lucky or' 'Get-Goers', and know fully well how to manage and tackle any upset/ problem in life, while others writhe under stress and strain of even minor and negligible problems.
If you learn the art of compromising with your problems but, at the same time making concerted efforts to solve the problem, you are, not likely to be overcome by upheavals and, if at all, you are affected, you Won't take much time to recover, as compared to others who, are in the habit of treating every minor problem as if heavens have fallen.
Your approach to life depends a lot on the way you live life. If you can compromise with minor upsets of life with grit and determination, and also remain unruffled, calm, quiet and composed, even major upsets won't be able to disturb your mind. Hence, always try to have a constructive, factual and practical approach to life and the events, howsoever disturbing they may seem. There is nothing impossible in life and remember if mere are problems, there certainly are solutions also, even if the latter may be evasive and far distant.
The 'diehards' and 'stickers' have neither the steel-will nor an honest determination, hence solutions to their problems are far away to seek. Effort is always motivated by will and, when both are lacking or missing, nervous breakdown is the only probability. It is solely upto you as to how you view an odd situation and what steps you take to unwind the riddle. It is not a question grappling with the problem, the real test of a person lies in his acumen in meeting the challenge thrown by odd situations. Confidence builds up gradually and every pitfall or failure should fortify a person's will and determination.
SELF-ANALYSIS
If you wish not to fall a prey to nervous disorders, you are advised to weigh your own self on the following parameters
(i) Can you easily laugh away or take lightly the day-today problems?
(ii) Do you compromise quickly with your wife, children, friends, colleagues, boss or even with those who are hostile and inimical to you?
(iii) Have you a dependable confidant in whom you can -easily confide in event the most secret episodes?
(iv) Do you take all the events of life in normal stride or are you swayed and carried away?
(v) Are you in the habit of shifting the blame or passing the buck to more vulnerable persons or do you absorb the eventual episodes of your self or do you share your problems with others?
(vi) Are you a person of complaining nature or you reconcile to fate or you are on the look out of finding a scapegoat?
(vii) Do you seek help from others or accept the same gratefully when and if the same is offered (even if with some conditions)?
(viii) Do you take kindly to when others criticize you or you simply launch a counter-offensive, without caring for the consequences?
(ix) Are you in the habit or deriding, demeaning and slighting others (say your wife or your children) in the presence of outsiders?
(x) Do even minor incidents in your life, drive you out of your wits or make you panicky?
(xi) Do you make friends easily or you are quite choosy and discerning in this respect?
(xii) Do others confide in you and seek your guidance, counsel or do you simply feel offended when approached for the said purpose?
(xiii) Do you know the technique to relax, spend your leisure time in sharing with others around you?
(xiv) Are you haughty, peevish, snobbish, hot-headed or given to rage easily?
(xv) How you feel when approbatory remarks are used for you or you simply take even genuine criticism as an amiss to let you done, as if someone is making a mockery of you.
Above given is a measuring rod for self-assessment, introspection and requisite reform. I know, self-assessment is not an easy task and to weigh one's own self and draw a balance sheet of one's plus and minus points is still a daunting task. If you can weigh yourself, in the tight of aforesaid, posers, it is no mean an achievement and you can pat your self, and congratulate’ yourself for being so upright, true, forthright and honest. Before concluding this chapter I would repeat the advice of a renowned authority viz "Beware of the friends who flatter you, but pay heed to the ones who criticise and guide you".
SUGGESTIONS FOR SELF-DISCIPLINE (SELF-MANAGEMENT)
Following suggestions, to get rid of Nemours tension and how to manage the same by dint of self-discipline and self management may prove rewarding. Unless the will and determination is there to reform, no improvement is possible,
- Do not waste time, try to utilize it.
- Avoid unnecessary hurry, worry and scurry.
- Do not be insensitive to problems, either of yours or anyone else.
- Avoid drugs, alcohol, tobacco, narcotics.
- Remain engaged in some activity.
- Maintain regularity and discipline in your eating pattern, though occasional deviation may be resorted to so that monotony does not overpower you.
Attend to physical disorders without any delay, especially during old age.
Do not be avaricious. Limit your demands to the bare minimum level. You get stressed more when you go on multiplying your demands and non-fulfillment of demands leads to utter frustration.
Let someone listen to your problems; share your worries, anxieties and problems. Apply principle of 'law of (mental) catharsis' to get rid of mental burden.
Certain techniques may not suit a few individuals but can be much modified and tailored suitably to meet individual requirements. Your good or bad behavior is the measuring rod for assessing mental status of a person. Howsoever noble and good the intentions may be, but such laudable and appreciated traits are .offset by ill and rude behavior. People gauge us not by what we feel inwardly but by pattern, tone and tenor of bur behavior.
- Life is what we make of it There is hardly any person who had never undergone any stressful event during lifetime. Learn to live up with problems and face them bodily with grit and determination. Do not be swayed away by what opinion others hold about you. Simply discharge various duties enjoined upon you, to the best of your capacity, capability, and leave the rest to God.
Try to ease tension by mixing with people and sharing time with others. Try to be a partner in others' problems-it will give a sense of satisfaction.
Develop the habit of reading books or in writing or else involving rest of the family members in fruitful discussions on matters of common interest. It brings each member nearer to others and this is how a congenial family atmosphere is created, when interaction eases even tension-ridden states. Free exchange of views takes away element of mental reservation which is so important for all-round happiness of the family.
Never tender advice unless it is requested for. While advising, never try to impose your viewpoint on others. Remember, advice is never mandatory, it is simply a suggestion and that advice seekers should enjoy the option to have their way.
It is detrimental and self-defeating approach to resort to and turn to intoxicants to seek mental relief. In most cases such habits wreck family peace and also prove as a drain on family resources. Imagine if other members in the family also follow your footsteps, what would be plight of all. Such short-cut methods are not conducive for health and are no solution to overcome problems. It simply drives, finally, to further despairing and depression.
- Try to be of service to other people around you. It is a sheer pleasure to be of help to others, by sharing their agonies and problems. Further, it is a constructive pastime also for the retired persons or for those who have no job to perform.
CONCLUSION
Certain events, situations and problems are beyond your control but some of them could have been averted with sensible and judicious approach, whereas natural calamities, sudden losses or even deaths lie beyond everyone's power. It is said forewarned is forearmed. If you are conscious of the impending problems, you can always take per-emptive actions and cautious approach, thereby getting ready for the crisis situation.
Among nervous disorders stress is the biggest and most dreaded monster and tension, worry, anxiety, depression are merely off-shoots of stress. Symptoms, like Nervous breakdown, depression nervosity, schizophrenia, psychic upsets are not much different from each other and cause behind all such upsets indicates bur inability to cope with a sudden and unusual, but unpalatable situations, and lack, on our part, to absorb aftermath of unwelcome situations.
Firstly such upsets disturb our mind which carries its reactions/impressions to our brain. When brain is upset, our endocrine glands start secreting abnormally and when glandular secretions/are either deficient or more, our body organs and their normal functions get adversely affected. This is a chain of metabolic disturbances and resultant diseases. In such situations, if our body is already loaded with physical disorders, it won't be in a position to sustain and bear extra burden in the form of new diseases. Finally our body wilts and breaks down also under strain 'of such upsets.
When we talk of self-management, it doesn't imply that an affected person is required to wage a war against trivial situation himself- he should better seek advice, guidance and counsel from one his friends or confidants. If you can unload your worries and make an honest disclosure/exposure thereof, you will automatically rid your brain also from such upsets. There is no harm in sharing your problems with those who are your real well-wishers and sympathizers who can also tend you a helping hand in solving your problems.
There are varied approaches and opinions in this regard. Some opine that an afflicted person should not disclose his problems to anyone lest he is made a laughing stock. No doubt certain people enjoy when others are in distress. But, then, why to make such inimical and insensitive people partners in your worries? There is no dearth of sincere and noble persons who can always come to your rescue, apart from giving your practical suggestions, enabling you to overcome you problems. People belonging to the last category, are the ones who need to be approached — the second opinion favors contacting these people. The choices is purely a matter of individual approach and the angle from which a problem is viewed.
You have to discipline your life in such a way that you can take odd situations in a normal stride and learn to compromise with the changed situation with strong will power, grit and determination. If you cannot reform yourself or change your attitude to life, very rarely anyone else can come to you rescue to take you out of the troubled waters. So, learn to live with oddities of life with a cheerful mind.
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